we are pretty sure m*riad thinks we are too much work

it’s too much work to make our pleasers feel useful, it’s too much work to process, it’s too much work to deal with our triggers.  i don’t know.  it’s a tough thing for us.  our whole body tightens and gets cold our head detaches and floats like a balloon.  we play katamari to ignore the [...]

i am sad and small and scared

i know i am a bad girl.  i know that for sure.  i know i am bad very bad and scared.  i know things are not safe and not what they appear to be.  i know that no one is safe.  i know that i am not safe.  i know that i don’t know things [...]

okay, this is a seriously embarassing entry, but i’m going to write it anyway

so m*tt was here (already you can tell this is a teenager or preteen) and we just, wow this is seriously more embarassing than i thought it would be.  it is so odd what is embarassing for us.  i guess all or almost all admissions of embarassment, guilt, and/or shame.
blah okay.  so i am supposed [...]

it’s because she is still seeing mom

she is still seeing her.  she is the favorite.  she is the channel for her energy.  i am picking it up off of e*a.  i swear if she weren’t talking to her it would be different.  but i guess she’d be in a different place but she is on that side not conscoiously but the [...]

we had this talk with m*riad that got us thinking

about sex and what being a bottom or a top allows us to do. i think if we are a top than we are in charge of getting the other person off and kind of how things go in general. as a bottom, we are responsible for being as sexy as possible so [...]

okay this is crazy but whatever

i think we got triggered by like the demon stuff or satanic stuff in suffer the child and we looked thru our flickr and found this drawing
i don’t know our leg shook alot and we realized it was actually called demons which was wierd but whatever.  anyway, we are crazy but we feel like something [...]